11.4.12
That's no moon
by Matt Worley

I saw Star Wars when I was five (in 1977) and suddenly going to the movie theater was something other than Disney flicks. Before that it was re-releases of animated Disney classics (Jungle Book and Robin Hood are big favorites) and the Apple Dumpling Gang (and other movies where the kids are waaaaay smarter than any of the adults).

My brothers and I were obsessed. We collected the action figures. I received my first ones when I turned six: Luke, Darth Vader (both with the arm retractable light sabers)and Leia. Eventually we'd have over a hundred, all well used and played with. They are today, individually, in no shape to be worth much of anything. Although we did acquire one of the rare tall Walrus Man from a Sears action set. I think this came from a garage sale because we didn't have the rest of the set. This figure is worth over $100 on its own.

An action figure aside: Boba Fett was a cult favorite because he was, actually, an action figure before he was a character on film (obtained before Empire came out with proof of purchases and shipping and handling). Why is everyone so confused about this? Okay, back to the main theme.

But we were kids, and this was an adult movie (there were no kids in it, and nothing really that tried to relate to children other than fast paced action and laser guns). It also set us up to try to be rebels for the rest of our lives. The Rebels were the heroes. The Empire was the villain. Authority figures beware!

The Empire Strikes Back was confusing. "Darth Vader is lying! He's just trying to trap Luke!" Seriously, this was our line of thinking up until Return came out. And then Return was kind of silly, because it suddenly decided to be more kid friendly.

But the original trilogy, which wrapped up when I was eleven, is still canon. The subsequent re-releases (with "fixes") and prequels all proved that Lucas didn't get what he'd put together in the first place. Seriously, they were not kids movies, and that may have been one of the biggest reasons for their success (they appealed to everyone and didn't talk down).

In fact, everything that came after Return made a few of us wonder if, somehow, some other guy was responsible for the amazing phenomenon called Star Wars.

Maybe it was kind of like saying Stan Lee is responsible for the entirety of the Marvel comic book line. Like that venerable line up of super heroes, we can step back and let someone else take the reigns.

Because Disney bought Lucasfilm (which includes Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Industrial Light and Magic and Skywalker Sound, both of the latter do tremendous special effects work on other movies) last week. It was a little surprising because Lucas had "stepped down" a few months before to let E.T. producer Kathleen Kennedy take the reigns of Lucasfilm take over. Apparently that stays in place, so maybe all of this was kind of predestined as well.

Lucas had said he intends to donate most (if not all) of the purchase price ($4.05 Billion) to educational charities. So he's not hurting for money. I think he's just ready to retire.

And the rest of us will get to see better Star Wars movies.

At least that's the hope. They won't be the rated R fantasies (there's always been this hope since Return that a Star Wars and BladeRunner type film, darker and sexier, would come from the SW universe), but they won't have a pre-Darth Vader riding improbably-built space cows either.

If they suck, well, then we get to blame the mouse instead of king George.


Matt Worley wholeheartedly endorses Barack Obama, because the Mitt is that boss who built another house for himself on the money you made for him.


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