It seems like we've got a gang of Ids running around the beltway unable to control themselves in the wake of obscene corporate donations, political pussy and eager interns.

Elected officials seem to think it's fine to cheat on their taxes, screw the poor and hit on anything that strikes their fancy.

John Edwards cheated on his dying wife WHILE HE WAS RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT! Whether he used donations to try and cover it up...I don't care. I didn't give him any money. But really? Just because Newt Gingrich did it (and guess what, he ain't gonna be president either) doesn't mean you should. Dumb ass!

And the Weiner thing, it's like you think what you do on the Internet or your phone is somehow private. Didn't you watch the Facebook movie? Haven't you heard of Brett Farve? Do you think this is appropriate? And, by the way, you aren't single. Dumb dick!

And there's a reason you aren't single. Or an atheist. Or an outed gay. Because you are an elected official. There are certain things you cannot be outspoken about if you want to get elected. Everyone knows this. There are few exceptions to these rules.

I'm eternally single (although, I am heterosexual). An atheist. And I've done drugs. Sometimes I drink too much, but usually I make sure I don't have to drive home. DUIs suck. Worse than herpes when it comes to getting a job.

But there must be something in the air in the swamplands of D.C. that makes all those people think they are different than everyone else. And, at the same time, able to do all the really stupid shit the rest of us think is really stupid. As long as they don't get caught, right?

I'm sure everyone would like to blame this all on Clinton and blue dress blow job. But it's been going on forever. The difference now is that all these ways we "communicate" with each other, be it private or public, saves evidence. And it's pretty hard to cover up the crap you do over this great cloud of technology.

There's a flurry about the Palin emails from her half term as governor of a backwoods state. Like we're gonna find out anything we don't know already. All you have to know about her is abundantly clear when she opens her mouth. What she says and how she says it is enough. Damn, I broke a rule. I wasn't gonna mention her name unless she actually decided to give up her paycheck to run for a crappy (albeit high-profile) public service job again.

Should Weiner resign? Yep. I'd get fired if I used company computers or phones to do what he did. Should Edwards never ever ask anyone for money for anything ever again? No, he shouldn't ever (never).

Should the people in congress pay all of their taxes? Yes. Should they restrain from taking pictures of their junk? Yes. Should they try to realize that soliciting sex (even if there's no physical touching involved) is still engaging in a prostitution like activity (which is still illegal pretty much everywhere)? Yeah, and this whole sex rehab thing...IS A FUCKING SCAM!

The great circle jerk of politics keeps all these screw heads in their jobs. They can stand up and proclaim they are against what that other screw head is for. And so they are making a stand. But we just keep going round and round. Anytime anything remotely useful gets passed, it turns out to be so watered down, they should have just stuck with the original water.

Water is pretty good. No artificial colorings or flavors needed.

And, trust me, we don't want to see what any of the elected look like without their clothes on. Politics isn't that sexy.

Matt Worley is a founding member of the Not A Dumb Ass Party.