Just when you think you've got it all figured out, here comes a change of mind-altering proportions.  That's right, your Zodiac sign has probably been wrong all along.

According to actual star watchers, the earth passes through thirteen constellations instead of the traditional 12 that we know.  Under the new dates, Scorpio only occurs for a week, and the serpent bearer Ophiuchus takes up the slack.  If you've ever seen the constellation of the dude holding a snake, that's Ophiuchus.

This means that I'm not the Cancer crab I've always thought, but the Gemini twins I assumed I narrowly avoided by being born two weeks late.  Oh, what can a person truly believe in, if not Astrology!

I've never actually put a whole lot of stock in Astrology, but over the years, I have come to accept that people's personalities do vary upon what time of year they were born, or conceived or whatever.  My wife is Pisces: imaginative, sensitive, compassionate & kind.  Also, secretive, vague, weak-willed and easily led.  Close enough.  My daughter is a Leo: generous, warm-hearted, enthusiastic and faithful.  Also,  pompous, bossy, dogmatic and intolerant.  She's only two, but all those characteristics do exist.  Me as a Cancer?  Emotional, shrewd, intuitive and protective.  Also, moody, touchy and changeable.  Yeah, that sounds like me.

Of course, the brilliance of Astrology is in its vagueness.  I'm sure we all have characteristics that match many Zodiac signs.  If you say I'm now Gemini: adaptable, witty, communicable, nervous, tense, inquisitive and cunning, I'd say you were close enough.  Cancer makes more sense for me though.

That's because Astrology has been making predictions for its characteristics for centuries based on the standard 12-sign blueprint.  Throw in the serpent bearer, and we really don't like being bumped out of our original group.

It's just another example of being told something one way, only to discover much later that not much of it is based on fact.  How many times have we been told that salt is bad for us, only to be told later that salt is needed for survival?  Now, in the information age, we can find "facts" to back up any way of thinking we choose.

This wrinkle in the Zodiac signs just means if we don't like the sign we were born under, we can always consider ourselves the sign before that.  The "fact" is that the Babylonians decided to omit a constellation because 12 matched up much better for our calendar year than thirteen.  Throw out the facts for convenience.  Don't like being a Cancer?  Try Gemini!

Sigh.  The longer I live, the less I believe in anything.

I spent a semester in college learning all about the teachings of Freud.  At the end of the class the teacher said ‘Of course, pretty much everything Freud said has been proven false...but it sure was interesting, huh?'

I guess that's why we have Zodiac signs, horoscopes, astrology and anomalies like Ophiuchus.  It sure is interesting, huh?  Feel free to change your belief system at anytime.

Chris Jungle is not a two-faced Gemini!  No wait, yes he is.  No, he's not...