So Madonna will be the centerpiece of the Super Bowl halftime show. She'll be surrounded by Cirque du Soleil and a cast of thousands.

I'll admit, it could have been a lot worse.

In recent memory, nothing has been as painful as watching Roger Daltrey and Pete Townsend stagger around a stage looking a lot older than my almost 95-year-old grandma. Note to Pete: When you've got to hire out the guitar-breaking act, it might be time to get off the big stage.

So. Madonna. Football. I'm fine with that. She puts on a fine show, and she generally has good taste in song doctors. Also, she's never been shy about her use of pre-recorded vocals, so there's no scandal in that department.

I don't have anything to complain about here, so I'll simply update the short list of Super Bowl Halftime entertainers.

1. Bon Jovi. I was a fan as a kid, and I'm not now. But these guys are amazingly popular (they're among the few mega acts that actually sell CDs) and they put on a good show. It would not be edgy or exciting, but the Super Bowl people like that.

2. George Strait. He's not real exciting, but he's still great and he's still wildly popular (just had another #1 song this fall). If you think he'd need a little help, get Taylor Swift, Miranda Lambert and Brad Paisley to tag along. Actually, the idea of Swift and Lambert trying to share egos on the same stage makes this an even better idea.

3. Neil Young. You just know this would kick ass. Remember the Olympics? Sure you do. Neil would scare the hell out of the Super Bowl people, of course. And I seriously doubt he'd even think about it. Unless…

4. Pearl Jam and Neil Young. Okay. This one works great. Sure, Pearl Jam has been washed up for more than half of its existence. But maybe if you threw in Foo Fighters, things would be better. Maybe.

5. I know, I've said it before, but Jay-Z/Beyonce would kill. And you know it, too.

That's the short list. Of course, there's also a short list for the "surprise" guest star of the show. Sometimes (like with Prince), there's no need. But I think Madonna would be more than game. And in any case, there's a very short list for the special guest. Another Italian girl who works the fashion almost as hard as the music: Lady Gaga.

This is so obvious that it obviously will never happen. But as one of those zeitgeist cultural moment things, it works. Lady Gaga is actually established. Madonna is actually embalmed. They both love clothes and shows--particularly shows that have the possibility of shocking. And that's probably why the Super Bowl Halftime Committee (and there has to be such a thing, of course) has probably already stashed Madonna in a secure location so that she can't be exposed to unsavory influences.

As if.

Oh well. It's all in fun. I tend to spend Super Bowl halftime loading up on extra food and making sure there's enough beer in the fridge. And no, I don't have a favorite Madonna song that she just has to sing (though "Burning Up" is pretty nice). In truth, none of this matters to me. The fun is all in the speculatin'.

Jon Worley speculates about a lot of things, but not about this season's playoff chances for the Chiefs.