I like watching the Super Bowl. Two teams I don't care about playing football is a nice, mindless way to spend drinking a few beers. I usually start watching sometime after the kickoff and quit when I figure out which team will win.

So what I mean to say is that I missed the Bill O'Reilly interview with the Prez before the game. The one (so I read) where he kept telling the Prez "They hate you!"

Obama's response (something along the lines of "the people who don't like you don't know you.") was probably too measured for most folks, but O'Reilly was right: Plenty of people hate the Prez.

I just don't get it. I wasn't a fan of either president Bush, but I can't say I ever got into "hate" territory with either. The elder Bush was annoying, and the younger Bush was largely incompetent, but I think the most I could muster was extreme annoyance. If I'm gonna hate someone (or something), I'm gonna make sure that person (or whatever) feels my wrath.

I know, lots of the folks who hate the Prez hate him because he's a black man in a white man's office. And others hate him because he's a Communist. And still more hate him simply because someone told them they should. All of that is silly beyond words. A little scary, I suppose, as it shows the utter bankruptcy of critical thinking in our nation. But mostly silly.

I hear that earlier question, though. If I couldn't bring myself to hate George W. Bush, what could I hate?

Let's see. I don't hate Christian Fundamentalists. I don't like the sanctimonious sneer that some of the big-time evangelists have, but I really can't hate people who believe that God talks to them. Whether we're talking about a misplaced metaphor or psychosis, there's something in those folks that just ain't right. Though if they keep it to themselves, I promise not to worry myself about them one little bit.

I also don't hate murderous dictators, largely for the reason that my enmity will mean nothing to such fools. I'm not going to waste something as energy-intensive as hate on some momentarily-rich asshole in some other country.

The principal at my sons' school that has threatened suspensions for anyone even thinking about playing in the snow at school? I've been sincerely tempted. But I also know that this rule is intended to keep bullies from dumping slush on other kids. I think the rule is a little heavy-handed (consenting kids get into snowball fights all the time), but I can avoid outright hatred. If I work hard enough.

The Yankees? Hoo, boy, this one's tough. As a Royals fan from back in the 1970s, there's no team I like less. But do I really hate the current collection of Yankees? Not really. And I can honestly say I don't mind Derek Jeter. He's not my favorite player, but I don't find him annoying. Of course, it only took ten years of therapy to be able to acknowledge that.

John Boehner? I have a long-standing rule not to hate drunks. So he's safe.

Bill O'Reilly? Keith Olbermann? Rush Limbaugh? Michael "Savage" Weiner? Boy, can I not find the time for them.

So, really. Who do I hate? You know what? I hate just one person right now. And that is the person who decided to discontinue Extra Supermint gum, my favorite sugarless gum of all time. If I were to meet that person on the street, I'd step on his toes. Or maybe even spit on her pants. I mean, they'd really feel my enmity.

All I can say is that if you're gonna hate someone, you'd better have a damned good reason.

Jon Worley used to hate Michael Bolton, but he forgot about that a few years ago.