The time has come. Little Donna Rose is almost a year and half old, and the glowing box has officially become fascinating. Not all the time, not every channel, but those folks in charge of little tiny children's television know a little bit about capturing the interest of wee ones.

Of course, I don't remember my teeny tiny television experiences. The first show I remember being fascinated by was "The Incredible Hulk" when I was three years old (way back in 1977). I didn't really understand much of the ins and outs of the program, but I always thought it was cool to see the pissed off doctor guy turn into a green body builder. Add "Sesame Street," "The Electric Company" and random cartoon moments (my folks didn't approve of Saturday morning cartoons), and that sums up the extent of my early boob tube days.

Thirty years later, a house with cable can have at least ten channels of children's television. Most of them are run by either Disney or Nickelodeon. There's even a channel called Sprout that's meant for the wee wee ones. Donna Rose is already addicted, sort of.

Her attention span is still less than five minutes, but invariably, she will point to the TV within five minutes of getting up (usually around 7:30 in the morning). Daddy's rule is no TV before 9 a.m., but Daddy is gone early at least half the week. No matter how much she points or whines, Donna Rose must find ways to entertain herself until that 9 o'clock moment.

Donna Rose loves "Sesame Street," "Dora the Explorer" & "Sponge Bob Square Pants." She knows when people and monsters are talking funny, and it's surprising how good her timing is with laughing at punch lines. She also jiggles around when her favorite songs and network promos come on. I must admit that the Dora song "We Did It" gets stuck in my head. They sing it at the end of every episode.

I know most of the Sponge Bob characters now, even though I rarely focus on a whole episode. Let's see, there's Sponge Bob, Mr. Crabs, Plankton, Squidwood, Patrick Star, and whatever other characters feel the need to pop in. I don't mind Sponge Bob. It reminds me of "Ren & Stimpy" for kids.

Some shows annoy me, like the "Sunny Side Up Show" and "The Goodnight Show" on Sprout. There's a live person talking to a puppet on both shows. Chica the Chicken in the morning and Star in the evening. Chica squeaks instead of talks and Star looks like a sopapilla instead of a star. Donna Rose is entranced by the night time host Nina, and tries to do whatever she says. It's bizarre but amusing.

I know what some of you may be thinking. One and a half and already hooked on TV! What kind of parenting is that! Yeah, yeah, yeah. When you have a kid who bounces off the walls on a regular basis, whatever distractions work will be used. Even if it works for five minutes. It also justifies the cable bill a little bit more.

I don't think she's learning much from TV. I don't really buy in that educational TV is really that educational. I'm sure Donna Rose will learn to count to twelve and her ABCs and how to read, but it won't be from TV. The boob tube works for kids just as much as it does for adults. It's a comfort, a distraction, a time to chill out for a spell. How much do I learn from watching sports and movies? Not much, but it passes the time nicely.

So there you have it. Having kids means having to watch children's programming. It may seem silly and condescending to me a lot of the time, but the little tikes do get a kick out of it.

I still get to watch my sports and movies, and I'm sure Donna Rose finds them silly and condescending as well. That's when she looks at the TV, points, and says 'eh?' Like she's in charge of what channel is on. Yeah right. Good luck, baby. If there's one thing Daddy's still control in this world, it's the TV remote.

Chris Jungle does not live in a pineapple under the sea.