It was past three o' clock in the morning on New Year's Day, and I was in working my eleventh hour of twelve in the cab. I picked up the male lead singer & female bass player of a band I knew called Unit 7 Drain. They were the first people I drove all night that I actually knew, and it was fluke I took the call at all. The asked me about my defunct rock band Old Beans, and I asked them about how their recording of a new album was going. They asked what I'd been up to, and I told them about the plays I acted in and directed in the last half year since my band broke up. Then they told me about a crazy honeymoon trip they had in Europe and asked me the one question no one had asked all night (and I'd been keeping to myself for a week): What's next for you?

"Well," I said. "My girlfriend's pregnant, so..."

Strange how that rock couple became the first public people I told. Only my girlfriend & brother knew before that. Since then, I have told my parents, oldest brother, grandmother, assorted people I've seen in the last two months, and announced it in my bio for the play I'm currently performing. Now, I'm letting the faithful SUIT column readers know: The jungle is growing.

I've been seeing Maria for almost two years now, and not including relatives, she is the best woman to enter my life. The strange twist is that she's much younger than me. I'm 33 and she's 19. Even though it still confuses other people, I got over the age difference a long time ago. To make a long story short, I dated her as a twenty year old for six months before I discovered she was actually 18. I could have run away from her then, but I didn't.

Back at the end of October, Maria dropped a bomb that she was pregnant. She took birth control, but nothing is fool proof, especially in the jungle. We had the big conversation. I told her I was a pro-choice guy, and she assumed I wanted to get rid of it. This is a misconception many people have about being pro-choice. I really do believe it's up to the woman to decide. They are the ones who have carry the child. They have to commit themselves to a long drawn out process. I would stand by her either way. She decided to keep the child, and I promised to stay with her.

That was on a Monday. On the ensuing Friday, I performed in a play, and my brother was waiting for me after the show, telling me Maria was in the hospital. I went over to find out she was having a miscarriage. We basically sat in the emergency room all night waiting for a doctor, and she occasionally went to the bathroom to bleed. By the time she was seen at 3 in the morning, we already knew the diagnosis. We just wanted things cleaned up. That day, I drove the cab at five in the morning, performed a play that night, and sat at the hospital until five in the morning. 24 straight hours. It was the longest day of my life. I could have run away from her then, but I didn't.

When she dropped the bomb again, it was the week before Christmas. She never got her period. She was pregnant again. There was no big talk of whether to keep it. After a miscarriage, you just want things to go well the next time.

Maria is now around 14 weeks. She's been eating and drinking healthy and embraced the pregnant lifestyle. I always thought she would a good Mom. I just never thought I would be the man. Guess what? I'm the man!

One of the first questions people ask when I break the news is if we will get married. That is the plan, but I also believe in doing big projects one at a time. It's not the traditional way, but if there's one thing people should know about me by now is that things aren't always traditional in the jungle. I love Maria more than anything, and that is a strong enough bond to keep me around until the papers are signed.

I finish up performing a play in two weeks, and then I will get Maria moved in with me by April 1. Even though she only lives a few blocks away from me, it still feels too far. I want and need to embrace this change full-time.

One irony is that Maria turns twenty (for reals!) on March 11. That's the age I thought she was at the beginning of our relationship. I guess it was a good thing we got those two bonus years.

People used to ask me if I wanted kids, and I'd say "Sure, but I have to find the girl first. I'm not having kids with just anyone." Well, I can honestly say I've find my girl. She has put all of my other relationships with women to shame, and at age 33, I feel this is my one legitimate shot at having a family. Even if it's sort of illegitimate.

So there you have it, SUIT readers. Now you will have another columnist blathering on occasionally about their offspring. I expect there will be a few things to comment on over the next few months and years. Thanks for being there during my bachelor years. The family years await, and around August 22, Baby Jungle will hit the scene.

Stick around.

Chris Jungle is the baby daddy.