I've never been part of a union, but I understand the point of collective bargaining. And I've never written for TV or movies, even though I did have a sort of tryout about ten years ago. Obviously that didn't go well.

But this isn't about Bill Maher and how I didn't even get a meeting with him and his producer. This is about all those other writers who are picketing in Hollywood (and even those who are being paid by the writers to hold the signs and say the stupid chants).

A revolt of sorts is happening. Not only are writers off the job, but a lot of actors (pretty much confined to TV at this point, because it affects them quicker than the movies) aren't acting in support of the writers. Somewhat irrelevantly, the Broadway stagehands have decided to strike. Coattail riders. Of course, if this thing isn't resolved by June of next year, well, then all of the actors and directors will be on strike, too.

The collapse of our society is imminent, you see.

Everyone's bitching, moaning and yelling about Iraq, Iran, border security, terrorism and Pakistan. There are these elections coming up next year, and everyone's running for something (except me, but it's early--don't count me out yet!). But that's not our society, you see. It's just a sideshow. Our society is held together by something much bigger and prettier than all of that.

We relate to each other by what kinds of entertainment we enjoy, not by our political beliefs. Now, I'm sure there are a few quick conversations at parties where people espouse their left or right leanings, but the longer, drunken and passionate discourses get into the finer points of the Transformers movie's underlying atheist agenda or the highly-moral underpinnings of "Desperate Housewives."

And what are we going to do when our entertainment options begin to run dry? The glue that holds us all together will begin to weaken. Anarchy is right around the corner folks. When there's no reason to stay at home and watch TV on any given night, what's going to happen?

It might revive going out to restaurants. And bars. Bowling alleys and tennis clubs. Longer and frequent walks in the evening. A baby boom from boredom.

You don't believe me? We had a miniature baby boom in Albuquerque because of being snowed in for a week (not just because of the snow, but because all that was on TV was holiday shit and reruns). What will happen when TV provides no distraction for married couples and teenagers? The human will is weak. Believe it.

First to go are the late night talk shows. No one can write jokes anymore, so they've all gone dark. This, actually, is the beginning of the baby boom. Instead of tiring each other out with lame Leno jokes, couples will switch off the TV and make bad jokes of their own.

We have scripted TV shows to last us through January, with a few extras (new series that have been held till next year just for this reason) that can be layered in, but that'll pretty much be it.

Movies will hold out longer, as they can keep shooting stuff until the end of next June. This means we will have movies for a while, but a lot of it'll be crap. And it's not like they have a good crap to exquisite ratio right now. Expect even more crap than usual. Not only that, but rewrites are out of the question. So if it hasn't been fixed by now, that script is gonna get shot with big plot holes and impossibly inane banter.

Have you noticed that none of the presidential candidates are talking about this strike? Have you heard a peep from any of them about how to avert this catastrophe? No. Because if it holds up, you're gonna have to really pay attention to this election. There won't be anything else on. Sports can go on. Reality TV shows will drain the blood from your veins, but there's only so much of that anyone can take.

Traditional advertisers will abandon TV, leaving a huge vacuum only to be filled by commercials and debates from fifteen people running for President, hundreds running for Senate and thousands running for the House. Hell on earth is right around the corner.

For the love of something holy, there must be negotiations. There must be a resolution. If not, all is lost. Our world will be changed forever. We will not even recognize ourselves in a few years. The end of the world is imminent. I beseech everyone to do whatever they can do to avert the apocalypse.

Matt Worley believes this entertainment strike is a worse threat than the incursion of video games into our every day lives. Guitar Hero my ass.