"I can't in good moral conscience vote for anyone for President who isn't pro-life."

"I'm afraid of anyone who supports gay marriage."

"I hate Mormons. I won't vote for anyone who is."

"I seriously don't think women should be president. They are too emotional, and they have that thing that happens once a month."

"A black guy for president? No way."

"There are too many people who won't vote for a women or a black guy. If you want someone who is electable, you really need to go with a Southern white guy."

"Governor of New Mexico? He can't run for American President, can he?"

"You have to think about who is going to keep you safe from the terrorists. We don't want another 9-11."

"We can't have any more of the Clinton-Bush oligarchy. We must change."

"If we vote for someone who will end the war, the terrorists will attack us again."

"We have to end the war now. I can only vote for people who say so."

"Only actors should be president. They can play the part."

"We need someone who has experience in Washington."

"What we need is someone who isn't influenced by the special interests of Washington."

"Raise taxes? Are you crazy?"

"We need someone who can negotiate with the Middle East."

"We need someone who can take care of these terrorists once and for all."

"We need someone with military experience."

"I only vote for people who believe Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior."

"What about the environment?"

"What about the economy?"

"What about education?"

"I vote for the person with the funniest TV ads."

"Someone needs to fix social security."

"I want universal health care."

"Who has the best hair?"

"Who is the best looking?"

"Who raised the most money?"

"Who makes me feel good?"

"Who tows the party line?"

"I like a straight talker."

"I think we should come up with our own candidate who thinks and does exactly what I want them to do."

"I'll vote for the most electable person."

"I'll vote the most real person."

"I'll vote for the most likable person."

"I'll vote for the rich white guy."

"I'll vote for the snappiest dresser."

"I always vote Libertarian no matter what."

"I always vote Democrat."

"I always vote Republican."

"I'm not registered to vote, but if I was..."

We all get one vote, and it really doesn't matter who or why. One more year of reasons to pick one name. Billions of dollars. Endless hours of debate, influence, bribery & scheming. One president. Are you ready? Here it comes.

Chris Jungle already feels disenfranchised.