"Jon, what's war?"

Before I get to my answer, I should explain that my almost five-year-old son Max generally (though not always) calls me by my first name. This doesn't bother me. Barbara insists on being called "Mommy," so that's what he calls her.

Sorry for the digression.

"War is where people who don't agree with each other try to kill each other."

"You shouldn't kill people. That's not nice."

"You're right about that."

"Why do they want to kill each other?"

"I don't know, Max. I guess sometimes people get so frustrated that they can't think of anything else to do."

"I get frustrated all the time."

"And what do you do?"

"Well, sometimes I yell, sometimes I cry and sometimes I throw a tantrum."

"Hmm. Maybe you can think of war as an adult tantrum."

"Okay. But why does the radio say the United States of North America is having a war."

"Because the United States is in a war."

"But not here."

"Not here."

"But Washington, D.C., is the capital. If you're having a war, shouldn't it be in the capital?"

"I don't think any place is a good place for a war. But this war isn't in our country."

"It's in Iraq."

"That's right."

"Where's Iraq?"

"Actually, Max, it's relatively close to Kazakhstan." (Our landlords are currently stationed in Kazakhstan, so that country is a useful reference point for Max.)

"Hmm. So people from the United States of North America are killing people in Iraq."

"Yes. And people in Iraq are killing people from the United States. Though mostly, people in Iraq are killing people in Iraq."

"That's not nice. But wait. If people are killing each other in their own country, is that a war?"

"Yeah. It's called a civil war."

"What's a civil war?"

"That's where people in one country divide up into groups and kill each other for one reason or another."

"So we have a civil war in the United States of North America, too."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, people get killed by other people in the United States of North America. So we have a civil war."

"Not really. We don't have groups of people killing each other. Well, I guess in some places we do, but that's not really a civil war. No one is trying to change the government."

"You mean no one is trying to blow up the Capitol like they show on the Weather Channel?"

"Right."

"Okay. So why is the United States of North America having a war with Iraq?"

"Good question."

"So why?"

"Because some people thought people in the United States would be safer if we attacked Iraq."

"Who?"

"The President and his party."

"And were they right?"

"Don't know. But right now, most people don't think the war was a good idea."

"They're right."

"Why do you think that?"

"You shouldn't have wars."

"Yeah, that's true. But sometimes other countries attack us, and then we have to fight."

"That's why we have armies."

"Right."

"So did Iraq attack us?"

"No."

"No?"

"No."

"Then the United States of North America shouldn't have attacked Iraq."

"I think you're probably right."

"And most people think we shouldn't have a war in Iraq."

"Right."

"So why does the radio say the United States of North America is having a war in Iraq?"

"Because we are."

"Even though most people don't think we should."

"Right."

"Why are we still having a war in Iraq?"

"I don't know, Max. But we are. I'll let you know when that changes."

"Okay. Then we can have a big party."

"It's a deal."

Jon Worley remembers almost nothing about Vietnam, though he turned five the day before we fled for good.