I have to admit it. I really have no passionate thoughts on the Immigration Issue. Protests rose up all over the country for a cause that Congress has hardly begun debating, let alone compromising. Kids walked out of school (give me any reason, and I would have walked out of school as well). Spanish-speaking radio DJs suddenly became crusaders. Everyone screamed "Remember the Mayflower!"

Yes, yes, yes, we all came from somewhere else, except the Native Americans, and they've been used and abused since the immigrants first started coming. I'm 31 years old, and most of my family tree has been in America since the early 1800s. Oh, I can say I have German & Irish & English & French roots, but really I have Southern White Trash & Midwestern Farmer blood flowing through me. It's been a long, long time since anyone in my family got off the boat.

I've met plenty of immigrants throughout my life. Mexicans, Laotians, Vietnamese, Russians, Africans, Europeans & on & on. They have never bothered me. I have never thought they were taking over. I never thought the problem was out of hand. I still don't.

But people are crossing the border! They're coming on boats! Illegally!

Yeah, so are drugs. So are diseases. So are animals. Get used to it. It's been happening for centuries now.

But we have to doooooooo something! Put up a wall! Make them pay back taxes! Give them greener cards! Kick them out! Let them stay! Protest! Protest! Protest!

Holy frijoles, people. Just settle down. It's funny how the immigration process works on its own. They work like dogs for next to nothing at jobs none of us would do (that means they aren't taking jobs away). They become maids and servants to many families (that means that families trust them with their homes & possessions). They even save money to buy things or send to their families far away (helping the global economy). These are not bad people.

As I continue to say: We are experiencing The Last Stand of the Great White Man & they know it. They are trying to do one last power grab before they have to start sharing the pie with everyone. It's why we're at war in Iraq (Hello? Young protesters? Why don't you walk out of school for that?) It's why gas prices are rising. It's why they wanted to change Social Security. It's why they are messing with immigrants. It's why the people in power right now are evil. They are clinging to the old white man ways.

So get off your high horse, Mr. Jungle, and tell us what do we do about all these immigrants! You say they're so great & you eat in their restaurants & you're so complacent and smug. Something needs to be done, and you can't just sit there in your drunk White Trash stupor!

Well, actually I could (God Bless America), but I'll tell you what think just for kicks. Forget the wall. This isn't China vs. Mongolia, and anyone who wants to get in still will no matter how tall the wall. Forget back taxes & fines. That's just the government wanting kickbacks and extra funding for their wars. Forget kicking people out. It's a freaking Melting Pot here, so stoke the fire.

It's actually immigrants that need to do a few things. First off, learn a little English. I'm not saying you have to speak fluently, but you have to get by. You will never rise above the dirt in this country speaking anything else. Second, keep your nose clean. The first time the cops bust you, you're going to get kicked out (and this is a Police State we live in). Lastly & most importantly, you have to LOVE the United States of America. You have to LOVE it so much that you will want to learn its history, its laws & its traditions. You will LOVE it so much that you'll want to become a citizen.

These things already occur in great numbers, so if we can get everyone to play by the rules we already have, this overblown issue will get resolved. Do you hear me Congress? How about just enforcing the laws we already have? What's that? They're on vacation? Oh. Figures.

Chris Jungle has no problem with mixing the colors.