Imagine the shock waves around the world in the last couple of days. The most attractive couple in the history of the world, Jennifer Aniston & Brad Pitt, are no longer a couple. I mean, if they can't stay together, what hope do the rest of us have?

Could this have been the real reason for the earthquake and resulting tsunami?

Of course, Brad and Jen do have more pressures on their coupleship than regular people. They have the problem of celebrity. They are high-profile beautiful people, which means pretty much everyone kisses their ass. Or takes pictures of other people kissing their asses. Or just watching their asses every move. After a while, it probably makes it hard to figure out who's being truthful--even the one person you're supposed to know in and out.

Say what you will about being famous, but at least us regular people don't have to deal with millions of complete strangers wondering how our lives are turning out. We just have to hear it from our families and friends.

I said at the beginning of last year that it seemed like everyone was getting married. Marriage was the new pink. There were a few couples I knew who got engaged at the end of 2003 and beginning of 2004. I attended two weddings in 2004. And a few other people I knew got hitched as well--I wasn't invited, but I heard they happened.

And this year, one of my cousins is getting married and another co-worker got engaged over the holidays. So it's not like hope has left everyone.

Many long-term marriages and relationships are still together. Everything hasn't turned to black for lovers.

But I do have an interesting ratio from 2004: Four couples got married, two couples had a child, and at least eight broke up long-term relationships. Long-term relationships are those that have lasted more than two years. Two years seems to be a pretty good barometer. You've found out about pretty much everything in that time, so there aren't too many surprises anymore. Except, maybe, that they keep doing those things you hate.

I think I know more single friends than married ones again. A year ago it seemed to be tipping in the other direction--somehow I was in the single minority.

This year, though, divorce is the new marriage.

I'm fairly ambivalent on the whole new trend of breaking up. Being single most of the time (I'm not getting into it; that's a novel unto itself), some might think I'd cheer when relationships break up. But that's cheering the misfortune of others. I try to stay away from that as much as possible. There's no real upside in it. I have misfortune and really don't like watching the cheerleaders lead the other side in howls of glee. Yes, I fumbled, but the game isn't over yet you bastards!

I have been able to define the difference between couples who stay together and those who don't: you either deal with the things you can't stand about the other person or you bail. I've bailed more times than I can even count. I wonder, sometimes, why more people don't bail. I hear horror stories from friends and wonder how they can put up with it. I guess I have an extremely low tolerance for bullshit or something.

But the same things a lot of people bail on, other couples find a way to get past and stay together. It's a mystery I've never been able to solve.

And what is the hatchet chop which ultimately splits a couple in two? Is there one defining moment or does the couple just get crushed with the weight of everything occurring over the course of a relationship?

When I talk to newly single friends, there are two things that'll happen: they won't say anything at all about what happened or they'll go into every little minute detail. The first leaves a bit of mystery, although the way they talk about everything else lends a little light on what happened. When you get the laundry list, well, it's hard not to agree with them.

And, as I told one friend, when they start throwing glasses at you, just get the hell out of there. No need to go to jail when you just want to leave the relationship.

But there is hope for all of us single people: we are legion. Lots of people to try again (and maybe fail again) with. And if a couple of us are lucky enough to cross their paths, Brad and Jen are looking for someone to rebound with.

Matt Worley will not be writing "100 Ways To Keep Your Lover" in the new year.