Children are sponges. Even when they aren't consciously learning, they're learning. When I was a kid, it seemed like I was learning something new everyday. Turns out I was wrong.

I was learning more than one new thing every day.

My son Max turns two in a couple of weeks. In his first two years, he has learned how to roll over, laugh, sit up, crawl, walk, run, jump, dance, climb, drink from a regular cup (not to mention a bottle and a sippy cup), eat with (and without) utensils, kick a ball, throw a ball, catch a ball, eat ribs (a very important skill in my family) and cry. And that's just the superficial stuff.

If the first year of a child's life appears to be mostly about doing (crawling, walking, etc.), the second year is about communication. Max started speaking in simple syllables at around 15-16 months. By 20 months he knew more than a hundred words and could pronounce them (relatively) clearly. Now he knows more than a thousand, and he's putting them into sentences. He not only describes everything he sees and does (something akin to a running commentary on la vivre du Max), but he's beginning to tell us how he feels about things.

Pretty cool. Except for the times when I've left him with friends or even his grandparents. Then he's been more likely to start screaming his head off.

When he was younger, this was definitely separation anxiety--his fear that he would not see my wife Barbara or me again. But that phase passed by the end of last summer. Even so, he would scream as we left and then almost immediately calm down once we had departed. He was mad at us for leaving him, but he wasn't actually afraid. It was comforting to know that Max was, actually, quite happy to be with other people, but those parting moments were horrific. One evening, Max actually tried to rip Barbara's shirt off in an attempt to keep her at home. And then, once the door closed, he apparently calmed down quickly and once again became a model citizen.

I was wondering when his obvious love of learning new things would translate into loving new situations as well. The tide turned three weeks ago.

Since last fall, I've had an arrangement with one of our neighbors, who is a law school student. I'd watch her son Alex (who is 5 1/2 months older than Max) one morning a week while she was in school, and she'd watch Max one afternoon a week while I put up the web site for the local alternative weekly newspaper. Max always howled when I left him, but he didn't stay bummed. He and Alex truly like being around each other. Alex likes to boss Max around, and Max likes to say, "No!" This is, apparently, a dream relationship for the toddler set.

Then three weeks ago--after a long holiday layoff--I took Max over to Alex's house on a non-exchange day, just so he could get used to the idea of hanging out there again. Alex had a new tricycle that his grandparents had given him for Christmas. Max immediately took to this "bicycle" (everything with spoked wheels, from jogging strollers to decked out cars, is a bicycle to Max). Max's grandma, who watches his a couple days a week, offered to bring over another "bicycle" so Max could play with it the next day.

For the next twenty-four hours, Max kept begging to go to Alex's house to play with the bicycle. When I took him over, he practically pushed me away, telling me to "go home and work." Okay, fine. A couple hours later, when I picked him up, he refused to go home. He'd even made friends with Alex's dog (a lab mix), which had previously scared the daylights out of him.

Since then, he's always asking to go over to Alex's house. It's not even the bicycle. He's developed a real affection for another place. That's pretty cool.

Barbara and I went out on Friday night, and we left Max over at Alex's house. He was to be put to bed by someone other than his parents or grandparents for the first time--and, more importantly, sleep in a house that didn't contain his parents. We were a little worried about how that would go, but as we planned to be back by ten, we figured the worst that would happen would be that Max would be a whiny, tired little boy.

But no. He'd gone to sleep perfectly in a room that he didn't know at all. He knew Alex and Alex's parents, and that was good enough. I guess.

I should have seen it coming. Lately, Max has been searching out the toys that Alex has and he doesn't, rather than picking up toys that he has at home or remind him of his own. He's beginning to enjoy walking into new places and actively seeking out the things he hasn't seen before. Once again, another door has opened.

I can't say that I'll miss the old "waaaaarghh" send offs. I much prefer the disdainful "go now," even if it means a less than sincere hug and kiss. I'd rather he be happy. And more importantly, I'd rather that he be making himself happy. If he can do that, then he's already learned one of the most important things there is to learn.

Jon Worley believes that most parental stress issues can be solved with "take two beers and call me in the morning."