If I told you that I had the answers, would you ask any questions?

If I told you I don't care one way or another about the Afghani people and their way of life, would you hold it against me?

If I told you at two o' clock in the morning that it was really one o' clock in the morning, would you take my word for it?

If I told you two guys came up to me asking for money and refused multiple bags of aluminum cans that they could exchange for money, would you still help out the poor?

If I told you my secrets, would you use them against me?

If I told you that I root for an NFL football team with a record of 1-6, would you think I was a loser?

If I told you I would sacrifice increased safety and security regulations for broader freedoms, would you look at me as being reckless?

If I told you what you are doing is wrong, would you attempt to find fault with me?

If I told you love is all you need, would you tell me you hate the Beatles?

If I told you it doesn't really matter, would you let it go?

If I told you our country is at war, would you change the subject?

If I told you to relax, would you tell me that you are already relaxed?

If I told you I'm not what you think I am, would you reconsider?

If I told you a sober life has as many problems as a medicated one, would you raise your glass to toast?

If I told you that nobody reads, would you write anyway?

If I told you that you are your own worst enemy, would I become your enemy?

If I told you a sick perverted joke, would you consider it harassment?

If I told you it's just a game, would you still play to win?

If I told you nothing at all, would it be better?

Chris Jungle told you so.