Some folks are born, made to wave the flag
Ooh, that red, white and blue
And when the band plays "Hail to the Chief"
Ooh, they're pointin' the cannon at you--Lawd!

It ain' me/It ain' me
I ain' no Senator's son, son
It ain' me/It ain' me
I ain' no fortunate one, no

"Fortunate Son"
Creedence Clearwater Revival

In these ultra-patriotic (verging on the jingoistic) times, just about every company doing business in America has draped itself in the flag. See the car companies, each declaring that zero percent interest is as American as it gets. Marvel as various elements of the tourism industry are running Bush speeches verbatim (a truly nutty idea, since he sounds worse canned than he does live) encouraging people to spend money on travel. Gasp in horror as Wrangler trots out "Fortunate Son," that ol Creedence Clearwater Revival chestnut, telling folks that jeans are about as American as it gets.

Never mind that, at least in the eyes of much of the world, blue jeans are the ultimate symbol of American economic hegemony. I really can't argue with the philosophy of the ad. Just use another song. Please.

What Wrangler does is play the intro (with an extra vamp) and the first two lines of the song as printed above (lyrics used without the express permission of copyright owner Saul Zaentz--but more on that in a minute). Then a (decidedly) quick fade. All very peppy and patriotic.

You know, as songs go I happen to think that "Fortunate Son" is about as patriotic as it gets. But that's because it celebrates dissent and individualism and divergent lines of thought--some of the things that truly make this country great. The song disparages wrapping one's self up in the flag, which is precisely what Wrangler and all the other companies involved in this supposedly patriotic fervor are doing.

To my memory, only one other song has been appropriated for advertising in such a distorted way. Some 10 or 15 years ago, I recall someone selling paint (and the happy home that results from a fresh coat of latex) with Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young's "Our House."

Just thinking about that one sends shivers down my spine.

I can't tell you what happened with CSN&Y and how it was they allowed their song to be used in such horrific fashion. I'd like to think it was one of the most breath-taking pranks in the history of advertising. But I don't know. On the other hand, it's only too obvious what has happened with "Fortunate Son." Saul Zaentz is still pissed off at John Fogerty.

Among other things, Zaentz is a movie producer (credits include The English Patient, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and Lord of the Rings--the Ralph Bakshi version. He's listed as executive producer on the one that comes out later this month, and that's probably because he still owns the screen rights), slumlord (he owns a ton of property in Berkeley, Calif.) and music impresario. His label, Fantasy Records, is best known as a jazz label (Fantasy released Vince Guaraldi's music for the Peanuts TV specials), but back in the 1960s Zaentz signed up a few rock bands on the label as well. CCR took off like a shot and totally made his nut. He's been living off the band ever since--which is not to say his other endeavors haven't substantially increased his wealth since then.

Fogerty and the other members of CCR sued Zaentz for nonpayment of royalties and a few other things. I don't think they really accomplished anything other than royally aggravating their old boss. Zaentz tied Fogerty up in contractual lawsuits until David Geffen ransomed the swamp thing with a rumored $1 million bribe. And after ten years of work, Fogerty finally released a new album in 1985. These days, Centerfield is best remembered for the title track--which was the b-side for "Rock and Roll Girls," a modest hit which scraped the lower realms of the Top 40. The smash of the album was "The Old Man Down the Road," whose success led to the hailing of Centerfield as a masterly comeback. Almost missed in the hoopla was the next-to-last song on the album, "Vanz Kant Danz," which was widely interpreted in the music world as a (somewhat inscrutable) slam on Zaentz.

Zaentz heard more venom than most folks, and he filed a multi-million dollar slander suit against Fogerty. For good measure, he sued Fogerty for copyright infringement, saying that "The Old Man Down the Road" borrowed integral parts of the CCR song "Run Through the Jungle."

Fogerty, of course, wrote both songs. Thing is, Zaentz holds the publishing rights to "Run Through the Jungle," (and every other CCR song) and so he claimed that Fogerty had no right to write a song that sounded anything like any of the CCR songs that Fogerty wrote. It's a tricky argument. There's a certain cold logic to it. But, as the court eventually ruled, Zaentz was just whining in the wind. Fogerty won both cases.

Ah, but now, 15 years further down the road, Zaentz has once again twisted the knife. He still owns the CCR recordings and publishing rights, and so he can sell the songs to whomever he chooses. He apparently has no qualms distorting the message of "Fortunate Son" to suit a mindless advertising goal. He's a money-grubbing whore with a worse grasp on ethics than those pharmacists who underfilled chemotherapy prescriptions. Every time I see that ad, I wonder why it is that Zaentz hasn't received one of those anthrax-tainted letters.

Oh well. Can't dwell on it. Can't let these things fester. Then I'd end up as crusty and rancid as ol' Zaentz himself.

Jon Worley wonders when the National Guard will start using the song "Ohio" as a recruitment tool.