"Everything seems to be ready. Are you ready? Ready? Well, why not?"
Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

"You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself."
fortune cookie

"You will all become deserters because of me this night; for it is written 'I will strike the shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered.'"
Jesus, Matthew 26:31

"We regret that we are unable to use the enclosed material. Thank you for the opportunity to consider it."
The New Yorker rejection letter

"Everybody knows that the dice are loaded. Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed. Everybody knows the war is over. Everybody knows the good guys lost. Everybody knows the fight was fixed: the poor stay poor and the rich get rich. That's how it goes. Everybody knows."
Leonard Cohen, "Everybody Knows"

"Has the Devil been chasing you? Is that what makes you so blue? Cheer up, cheer up, my own dear one, for your fight against him has been won. Yes, you've been up against it at times, and Fate in the form of the Devil has been at the bottom of it all. Now you can look ahead to better times. You will dream about the sun and that will be the beginning of a bright future. You are a very sincere individual, and like to be surrounded by your good friends. Your money troubles will soon disappear and you will be able to indulge in a few luxuries that you've been craving. You will be besieged by those less fortunate for monetary help, and no one will go unaided. Drop another coin in slot and I will tell you more."
Grandmother's Prophecies

"You need your creativity to skirt problems and get past another's resistance. A loved one or partner feels undermined or uptight. You might need to give more, financially or emotionally, than you anticipated. Tonight: Play the night away. Five stars!"
Saturday horoscope

"What is a man, if the chief good and market of his time be but sleep and feed? A beast, no more."
Shakespeare, Hamlet

"We like the boys with the bulletproof vests. We like the girls with the cellophane chests. We like to ride on executive planes. We like to sit around and get real paid."
Beck, "Get Real Paid"

"Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought--a vagrant thought, a useless thought, a homeless thought, wandering forlorn among the empty eternities!"
Mark Twain, The Mysterious Stranger

"You see, a dog growls when it's angry and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore, I'm mad.
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

"Instant Karma's gonna get you. Gonna hit you right in the head. You better get yourself together. Pretty soon you're gonna be dead."
John Lennon, "Instant Karma"

Chris Jungle predicts he will have something original in the near future.