A good friend of mine asked me how I come up with a column topic every week, and I told him that I pick something that affected me during the seven day span. It could be personal, political, artistic, sports related, or out of blind desperation to meet the column obligation. It might be something from the newspaper, fiction, other columns, the Internet, an incident I saw or experienced, or a topic other people have discussed with me. After hearing the explanation, my friend said "Well, I have something for you to write about." "Oh yeah, what have you got?" I asked with mild skepticism. I'd heard that line plenty of times. Then, he proceeded to tell me he was gay.

I've known this friend intimately for almost half a decade now. We were roommates for two years, spending many nights listening to a wide spectrum of music, watching movies, and rambling on about our creative ambitions (he as a musician and me as a writer). He's a only a year younger than me, and we always connected and regularly talked about the similar challenges we faced in life. Being the youngest in my family, I never had the opportunity to pass my knowledge on to any siblings. Almost unconsciously, I adopted this friend as my little brother.

He has always been a subdued person. His personality lends itself to him being a loner. Getting him to talk with any emotion beyond his low controlled monotone is an accomplishment. Even his most passionate rants had a mellowness to them. After living with me, he moved into a renovated one room garage to be closer to the university. This is where his torment, soul searching and revelations occurred. He had many nights and days alone in that room while practicing for his percussion recitals and ultimately finishing his music performance degree.

I would come by every now and again to check up on him and shoot the shit. With empty bottles of beer and whiskey decorating the corners, he told me about nights of heavy drinking and suicidal thoughts. I knew what he was going through in a general sense. I knew he was dealing with the fact that he wasn't normal. Anyone who doesn't connect with the mainstream has to go through the struggle and realization that they will always be different. Being different means anything that society in general doesn't encourage. This includes everything that doesn't involve making a lot of money, having a family with kids, fitting in or being upstanding citizens. Anything queer.

Now that I know my friend is gay, I'm actually relieved for him. Although I know him as well as anybody, there have always been a few puzzle pieces missing in his picture. I always encouraged him to open himself up and stretch his mind as far as he could. I was trying to inspire his creativity, but along the way, he made a few other discoveries. That's what the journey is all about.

Homosexuality is a highly debatable issue, both politically and religiously. Do they deserve specific rights? Are they sinners? What should we do with them? How should we handle the situation? I dislike the way many people (and organizations) approach to this issue. Homosexuals are people. They should not be singled out, given special rights or banned from churches. They are people you work beside, watch on TV and even hang out with from time to time. Some of them are people you'd like. Some of them are people you'd hate. I don't like every gay person I meet. Pretty much like "normal" people.

Homosexuals do not choose to be gay, much like heterosexuals don't choose to be straight. Because of his personality, I considered my friend the most asexual guy I knew. I'd talk to him about sex every now and then, but our best conversations involved other topics. Unlike some other friends in my life who came out of the closet, he doesn't have the stereotypical flaming tendencies. I don't consider his sexual revelation a sin, and there is no way I would shun him for admitting it to me. Sexuality has never been simple. To say there is a right and wrong way to do it is a simplistic and naive explanation. If every abnormal sexual tendency is a damnable offense, then heaven is a very boring, lifeless place, and I would never hang out in a club like that.

My friend is still my friend. He is the same guy he was before he came out of the closet. Except now I know him even better. We will keep doing the stuff we always have together. Our friendship has very little to do with sexual orientation and a lot to do with our creative bond. I am one of the first people he has told (the first being his actual brother). I know I'm outing him to the readers who know this friend, but like I said in the beginning, I write about things that affect me (and he said it was something to write about). Everyone won't be as accepting of him as I am. It's something that humanity as a whole needs to improve on.

In many ways, his life is just beginning, and I'm glad that I've contributed to his journey so far. What are big brothers for?

Chris Jungle is not gay, but he's not sad either.