The phrase "Tabloid Decade" keeps popping up, and I have to admit that the label sounds as good as any explanation of the 1990s in the United States. We've had Kurt Kobain, the Bobbits, the au pair, the prom mother murderer, Tonya and Nancy, OJ Simpson, anything to do with the Navy, Diana, and the endless amount of ignorant folks willing to ham it up Jerry Springer shows. To name just a few.

But let's talk about the tabloid of the moment, shall we? Regular folks may get fifteen minutes of fame, but Monica Lewinsky gets two hours chock full of advertising. Say what you will about Monica (and just about everybody is), she fulfilled the dream of every dumped lover in the country. Remember when that guy or girl dumped you, and you would have done anything to tell your side of the story on national TV?

Of course, how many times did you get dumped by someone you cared about only to find out that even your closest friends tired easily of your blathering after a certain point? But we never tired of our Monica. We wanted to know about the dress, the kneepads, the gifts, the secretary, the beret, the abortion, the weight problem, the hair styles, and the phone sex. Most of all, we wanted to hear her speak.

It turns out that her side of the story was pretty typical of a fling gone bad. Married man is attracted to younger "energetic" girl, girl flirts heavily until physical relationship is attained, man and girl sneak around for awhile, girl tells her friends, man realizes he has much more to lose than gain and ends relationship, girl freaks out and attempts desperate (yet subtle in her mind) attempts to woo the man back, the girl fails and the whole relationship blows up in both of their faces.

The big difference between this and every other relationship was who was involved. Instead of the football coach, it was the President of the United States. Instead of the cheerleader, it was an intern. Instead of the relationship ending up in divorce court or day time talk shows, there was an impeachment hearing. Instead of being a horrible embarrassment the town refused to talk about, it was the graphic, juicy scoop the media couldn't shut up about for a second.

Monica smiled in the beginning of her Barbara Walter's interview and cried in the end. She complained that the media ruined her family although she is now using the media and will be paid well for tragedy. Being a national scapegoat does have its perks. She's worried that she will never find a husband, but I'm sure she could buy a pretty good one for half a million dollars. She's worried that she will lose her immunity while the rest of us worry about losing our jobs. I don't love or hate Monica, but I just wish that she could change her perspective to realize things could be much worse. There are thousands of mistresses who would kill to be in her dress.

The weird thing about this tale is that I don't know what the moral is. Should we not tell our friends about our sexual encounters? Should we only have affairs with people of affluence and stature? Should we cooperate fully with the Special Prosecutor? Should we hold out for the really good book contract?

After a year of speculation, media scoops, party posturing, denials, admissions, the Starr Report, the Articles of Impeachment, the acquittal and the subsequent wrap up, I don't know what I really learned. There should be some overarching message about this whole fiasco that I can put in big letters on a sign to hold up at a basketball game, but nothing is coming to mind.

Is it all just a story that we will tell people who don't exist yet? Is it another essay question to put on an American History exam? Does this incident have implications for how the United States will see itself in the future? Or is it just, as Monica described oral sex, messing around?

Maybe we have been messing around. Maybe it was just a distraction to keep us entertained. Maybe the point was that it made everybody have an opinion. Maybe it was all hype. Or maybe we will forget about the whole thing and move on to other hype.

How long before the Episode 1 comes out?

Chris Jungle would marry Monica, but he would cheat on her every chance he got.