All the luck in the world
by Matt Worley

Sometime before the fall of the Berlin Wall, but after the ascendancy of Reagan, I was contemplating my life if I'd been born in Russia. At the time Russia (the USSR-- or from my stamp collecting days, CCCP), was the big enemy. They were the bear. They were always snarling, hiding their sick leaders (for fear of showing weakness), and threatening us with total obliteration.

Being less than enlightened (hell, I wasn't even a teenager), I believed everything our fearless leaders told us to be true. Russians were inherently evil because they lived in Russia. They wanted to kill all of us, if they could just figure out a good time to do it. Preferably a time when we wouldn't be looking long enough to throw up our retaliatory strike. And I thought it might be a good idea to have tons and tons of nuclear bombs, because that way if we died, they'd die and everything would be just and good.

But as I learned more about the realities of Russia, I became convinced that I was one of the luckiest people in the world. I didn't have to stand in line for toilet paper. I might have to stand in line to buy it, but there isn't a lack of bum wipe. And they don't just sell it on every other Thursday morning. When that first McDonalds opened up in Moscow, I was astonished to find out people waited in line for hours to get a burger.

I have never lived in a town without a McDonalds. Or a bowling alley. Or a movie theater. I've been to Dairy Queens that didn't sell Mr. Mistys, but the Dairy Queen was still Dairy Queen. Or Icy Freeze. Or Diary Freeze. Or Tastee Freeze. Something that implied an (almost) unlimited supply of cool treats. I had a choice of a burger or steak fingers or chicken fingers or fries or onion rings.

I can get anything I want in this country--as long as I have the money.

This is the system I'm familiar with. Living in Russia was not only foreign, but it was frightening. How did anyone live in those conditions? How could a teenager even think of being a teenager without access to the family car? How could a student learn if they didn't have pencils and paper? And if they didn't let students read everything the student wanted, how could they become fully-rounded people? I didn't know then.

I couldn't even begin to think of the calculations involved with determining the odds I'd beaten when I was born to a family in the United States. And besides that, my parents were white, they weren't in debt, and they didn't want to give me away. I was in a pretty sweet position--considering the economic realities of this nation.

And since that day of contemplation, I've always thanked whoever I was into thanking at the time for the way my life began. At least the odds weren't totally stacked against me. At least I didn't have to hunt for my food, or maintain a large garden for sustenance (I'm lazy, I love the supermarket). And, because I was born here in the U.S., I can say anything I want about anything I want to. Maybe it's not what the forefathers were thinking when they made the Bill Of Rights, but that's okay. Those guys are dead, and we have the right to interpret their ramblings any way we see fit.

I bitch a lot about the government. It's a pastime. Mostly because I feel I've earned the right to do so. I vote in most elections. Sometimes I skip the February bond election or the primaries (I'm not one for partisan politics--although I can name off the evils of either or), but the big ones--the ones that affect me the most--I'm there in front of a couple senior citizens signing my name and punching the buttons. Because I want to bitch.

But this week I'm gonna be nice. Because every once in a while I gotta take a little time to realize how cool it is to do what I do in my life. Work where I work, say what I say and spend how I spend. The circle of life, I guess. You know those anti-drug commercials where the guy is running around in a circle saying "I do coke so I can work more so I can make more money so I can do more coke."? Sometimes that is what it feels like. Working to spend to work to spend. But there is more, and we all get to the more every once in a while.

Maybe a lot of people are working for the weekends. Maybe they're working for their kids or their wives or husbands or pets. Maybe they're working to get somewhere else. Or working to play. Or not working at all--but let's not kid ourselves here--welfare is not a gravy train, more like rice and hot dogs. Everybody does what they can do get by. Sometimes we do things we don't want to do so we can do the things we want. But the cool thing about living here and being a citizen of the United States is that we can do most of these things without fear of reprisal.

I guess this country isn't quite the utopia we all wish it was. There is always something more someone wants to do, and somehow they think the government is keeping this from happening. But think about this: we can always dream--and sometimes dreams come true. That's the American Way.

Matt Worley enjoyed the few rainy days of reprieve from the 100 degree hot.

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