Stuck in the gateway
a SUIT column by Chris Jungle

An article published recently in the journal called Science states that chronic marijuana use primes the brain for other harder drugs of abuse. This is known as the "gateway effect." Of course, most people have been blaming marijuana for being the first step in a drug abusers life for years, but this is big because it's scientists talking. The study also said that all addictive drugs corrupt the same brain circuits, and they happen to be the same areas of the brain which chocolate and sex excite. It's funny that marijuana is considered the gateway instead of many other possibilities.

I've eaten chocolate since I was a wee lad, and while my mother tried to curb my cravings, it did lead to some odd behavior on my part. My mom kept unsweetened chocolate in the house, and according to her, it was for cooking reasons. To this day, I still don't know what kind of dish requires unsweetened chocolate. When I was about eight or nine, I would snoop in the cupboards when I was alone in the house looking for any kind of sweets that I could have and invariably I'd stumble along the unsweetened brown chunks. I broke off a piece and put it in my mouth. It tasted terrible. Even hot chocolate powder tasted better than that. I would, however, test the unsweetened box about once a month. I think I was going on the theory that the chocolate would become ripe and sweet and blissful. Personally, I don't think we would have ever finished that unsweetened chocolate if it wasn't for my constant checking.

The next two abusers of my pleasure brain circuits were alcohol and sex. They came at about the same time in my life, so they should be lumped together this way. While alcohol is ultimately a depressant, there is a slight euphoric feeling before it causes the body to come crashing down. Kind of like coming to a climax during sex. Sex and alcohol also complimented each other very well. After three or four beers, the desire for sex became greater and greater. It's not that guys think that women really look better when they're drunk, but it's more that guys are more willing to take any possible option for sex when they're drunk. And they even have the built in alibi of "Sorry babe, I was really drunk." Of course, everyone can now say "Sorry, but I just wanted a little more action in the pleasure centers of my brain."

Then after traveling for years along the chocolate covered, alcohol smelling, and sex stained road, I finally made it to The Gateway where the days were long and the weeds were smoked. According to the gateway effect folks, this is where all of the drug problems begin. They didn't start when I was jonesing so hard I ate bad chocolate, or when I stumbled around parties going up to anything remotely female saying "Hey pretty girl, you sure are a pretty girl." Feel free to use the line anytime. No, all of that activity was considered part of growing up. When I smoked a dried weed that made my eyes red, made me cackle at the news, and made me eat three burgers from the closest fast food joint, I had finally reached the gates leading straight to junkie hell.

Other studies have said those who try marijuana are seventeen times more likely to try cocaine than those who are pot-free. I believe that mainly because pot is more easily available, cheaper, and more likely to be shared. Most people don't just sit at home watching E.R. and say "You know, I've never done an illegal drug, but I think I'll spend the eighty to a hundred dollars for some cocaine. It's about time I see what it's all about." I tried cocaine, and like most people, it was introduced to me. In my case, it was by a girl I met, and it pretty much ties in to that sex thing again. You know what? It didn't really rock my world. I'm sure it was messing with my pleasure centers, but it wasn't messing with them in the right way. I think it had something to do with that aspirin taste stuck between my nose and throat. If that wasn't it, I'm sure it had something to do with personal preference overruling statistics.

There are other ways people work the pleasure center of the brain. Some people run for an extremely long time, some shoot smack, some drive cars or motorcycles really fast, some smoke crystal meth, some people go shopping, some drop acid, some gamble away hundreds of dollars, some lift weights, some drink coffee and soda pop, some dance, some take ecstasy and dance, some read, some talk in long conversations on the phone, some skateboard, some write poetry, and a lot of them aren't quite sure when or where or how they crossed The Gateway to their present state of being.

Chris Jungle has cut down his chocolate consumption considerably, but he'll always be labeled an addict, won't he?

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